Five years ago my husband and I bought our house. And for five years, I hated the color of our dining room walls.

Every so often I'd look at them and be reminded of how much I hated the color of those walls. For five years I told myself, “I really need to paint this room. I'll do it eventually....when I have time.”

For five years, I didn't get around to it. Until yesterday.

I finally decided I was going to paint the dining room.

Not because I suddenly had nothing else to do. It was a Sunday...trust me....I had plenty to do. I had groceries to buy, laundry to do and things around the house that needed my attention. Sundays are days I like to spend with my kids. And I could have taken some time for myself. There were a hundred other ways I could have spent that day.

But this time, I decided I was going to put all of that aside and paint the dining room. I was going to finally do the project I had been putting off for so long.

So I did.

It took me the whole day.

At 8:45am I left the house to buy the paint (I wanted to leave earlier but I had to wait until the whole house was awake, fed and settled). Next came hours of prepping the room (the worst part of painting in my opinion, and also the most time-consuming) and finally the painting.

I took my time because I wanted to get it right. This is a primary room in our house...a room that everybody sees. I barely took a break for lunch because I didn't want to lose momentum. I wanted to get it done.

I while I was working, I looked behind me and saw that the breakfast dishes were still sitting there. Then eventually came the lunch dishes. Because I wasn't cleaning up the kitchen, the kitchen didn't get cleaned up. I kept thinking, “When I finally finish the painting, I'm going to have to clean up the kitchen because nobody else is doing it.”

When I finally finished my husband told me how great it looked.

Then he said: "You waited 5 years and it only took you one day."

He was right, but that comment still bothered me.

I know he didn't mean thing by it but what I heard was, "It was only one day. One day isn't that much time."

And immediately I thought, "One day IS a lot of time.”

Because when you're a mom who struggles to find 30 uninterrupted minutes for herself, an entire day doesn't feel small.

It means deciding what isn't going to get done.

It means leaving the dishes. It means leaving the laundry. It means knowing the grocery shopping will have to wait.

It means choosing one thing while your brain reminds you of all the other things you should (or should) be doing instead.

It's not, “just a day.” And I think that's what can feel so hard to explain.

Sometimes it's not the workload that hurts the most. It's feeling like no one sees what the workload costs you.

Maybe you've experienced your own version of this.

Someone tells you:

“Just take some time for yourself.”

“Just go out with your friends.”

“Just make an appointment.”

“Just take the afternoon off.”

And you're thinking, “Where exactly is that time supposed to come from?”

Because taking time for one thing doesn't magically make everything else disappear.

That's the part other people don't always see.

They see one day. You see everything you had to move, postpone, ignore or let go of to create that day.

What if the answer isn't getting better at fitting everything in?

For a long time, so much advice for overwhelmed moms has focused on doing things more efficiently.

Manage your time better. Get organized. Wake up earlier. Create a better routine. Delegate. Prioritize.

Of course, some of those things can help.

But at some point, we have to acknowledge something much more basic: There are only so many hours in a day.

Maybe the goal isn't figuring out how to fit everything in. Maybe it's creating a life where you don't have to. Where your needs don't automatically fall to the bottom of the list.

Where taking an afternoon (or even an entire Sunday) for something that matters to you doesn't leave you feeling guilty. And where the people around you understand why “just one day” may not feel like just one day to you.

Where you feel supported instead of solely responsible. And where the people around you don't just see everything you accomplish...they understand how much you're carrying in order to accomplish it.

That's a big part of the work I do with overwhelmed, working and career-minded moms.

Because you don't need another person telling you how easy it is to squeeze more into your already-full life.

You might need help figuring out what you can finally put down (and giving yourself permission to put it down).

You don't have to figure that out by yourself.

I've created a variety of ways to support you whether you're looking for practical resources you can use on your own or more personalized one-on-one support.

Whether you're ready to make a big change or simply take one small step today, I'll meet you where you are.

See How I Can Help.

From mom to mom, please remember you are not alone and I'm always cheering you on.

xoxo,

Christi